(February 1992 - March 2020)

 

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Stephen was a survival role played by a Queer kid growing up in Nowheresville, South Carolina at the turn of the millennium making his way to Hollywood to see what this world had to offer, and what he was made of. 

 

It is actually pretty easy, with massive amounts of work and a tireless discipline, to become what this world sees as ‘successful’ and as this experience of hoarding worldly treasures teaches all of us… that’s not it… that’s not where the answer is… this too will fade to dust… this too… and that other thing too… we are temporary...

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I finally started hearing whispers of non-binary indentities back in 2015 or so… at first feeling like that didn’t apply to me, I just have my nighttime, feminine style, and my daytime, worktime, hetero-world-masculine style called ‘Stephen’… I like to flow between, beneath, beyond these projections… but, non-binary… I don't know…

A few months go by, the questions keep piling up…

Is this right for me?

Will I be this identity forever… or will it too change?

How do I claim this identity… a name tag?

What if I get it slightly wrong, maybe I will want to spell my name differently… or ask for different pronouns… and then have to come out.. Again…  and, again… when i change again...

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2020 

 

Do I have any desire to make art, go on auditions, submit proposals, go to the grocery store as ‘Stephen Beitler’?… 

 

No…

Stephen was never my first name in the first place, it was always a stage name to me, a role to be played like “Taylor Mac” or “Judy Garland” ...but, this role called Stephen spilled over into every aspect of my life including my family, friends, teaching, and permeated my old online presence. 

I have always been a method actor… I’ve tried every other technique, every other school of acting, but I just can’t seem to help but embody the role I am playing completely…

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So, here we are, time to engage with the world again, but this character, this style, this art-piece, this great act known as ‘Stephen Beitler’ is nowhere to be found… His last piece created somewhere along the way, his Coup de grace, his swan song, his fond farewell lost in all the other noise of his time...

 

Yet, this entity writing these words needs some sort of name, a reference point…

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Love is,

 

SkyE